"Truly, she is amazing and different," I said when I read the first text by the poet Mashael Abdullah, through which I became acquainted with her poetic talent. With all the elements of captivating language, she is preoccupied only with her text, even if the space for the usual public appearances has diminished. Through this dialogue, the reader will discover how much culture, knowledge, broad horizons, and literary skill lie behind these responses. So, here is the text of the dialogue:

• The question that often comes to the forefront is: Where did the poet Mashael come from to poetry, and where did poetry come from to her?

One does not choose to be a poet, but one does choose to be a good poet or not. Poetry requires work, grasping meaning, paying attention to depth, and mastering language. “I write to live, to breathe, to save my life from futility,” says Aisha Al-Hajj, and I write to find balance, to escape the confines of time and swim in eternity. I write to reconnect with myself and to translate my soul.

I write to understand, to learn, to cancel the absurdity of life by documenting the moment and singing its praises. The essence of the poem is wonder.

• Who influenced you, especially since your poetry directs the pulse and awareness of taste towards it?

•• There are many influences that create the spirit of writing and poetry in a person.. starting from childhood to the surrounding environment, the first readings, and the first surgeries. Likewise, a person’s knowledge and awareness are nothing but the product of accumulated knowledge and feelings that leave their mark on him to make him what he is in the future or present; therefore, I cannot limit a specific influence that was the only one behind my literary production.

• What about the environment and its poetic qualities?

•• My early childhood in Mecca certainly played a major role. The geographical formation of Mecca and its mountains brought different families closer together. The cultural and social diversity that Mecca abounds in, being a religious city, and the interest in history, poetry, and literature in my home were all present. All of this formed part of my love for poetry and my interests.

My mother is a history teacher who loves poetry and sings it even in her reproaches, affection, and calling out to me.

My father, a mathematics teacher, was a true inspiration for me to write poetry; I wanted to impress him and draw his attention to his refined literary taste and discerning taste. All these factors contributed to shaping my soul as a poet.

• What challenges did you face on your journey? And how did you overcome the barrier of hesitation and doubt?

•• The first and constant challenge was facing my fears of writing... of being exposed... What if I were freed from the guilt complex, from the idea of ​​perfection... from the anxiety of making mistakes... I remembered a quote by Nikita Gill in which she says:

“Before you ask her why she stayed, look at the way a caged bird sometimes refuses to leave, even if the cage door is wide open, and you call to it gently, trying to get it out of its prison to set it free. Perhaps then you will understand.”.

The artist is in a constant battle with anxiety and the desire to be seen and to disappear completely at the same time. This sensitivity is what connects you to the world of fragility that creates art.

• To whom do you owe your poetic talent?

Life, with all its ups and downs and experiences, is a product of our own experiences and accumulated wisdom. We divide our living selves into the texts we write, and we diminish accordingly. However, not everything we write is a product of real events that affect us personally, as much as we see and experience them in the lives of others. The poet is connected to feeling; therefore, he must capture details, immerse himself in attention, and embrace freedom, and be embraced by it. A poet who aspires to greatness cannot confine his imagination, nor can an imagination that aspires to greatness reject freedom.

• Between classical, free verse, and prose poetry, where do you find yourself?

•• As I write classical, prose, and free verse, and I consider them all to be poetry, I do not adhere to a specific style and defend it, but rather I enjoy what other poets write in prose poems and other forms, as Yves Bonnefoy says: “Poetry is not the use of language, but perhaps madness in the heart of language.”.

This requires the writer to be flexible, and I love this freedom; therefore, I find myself in the moment when the poem writes me in whatever form it wants.

When do you write the text? And do you write it all at once?

•• My texts often choose their time. I cannot force a text to come out because it will not be as I wanted it to be. The distance between what we want to say and what we truly want widens with such coercion. Therefore, texts choose their time according to feeling, experience, and the desire to say something. As for working on the text and reviewing it, this naturally comes after it has been written and its boundaries drawn, as is the nature of writing in every matter.

Who are Mashael Abdullah's competitors? And who are her rivals?

•• I have no desire to compete with anyone, and I do not see poetry as a field for competition and racing. Rather, it is your inner voice, your visions, and your desire to pursue the light. The poet searches for himself in his battle with existence, wanting for himself a position within himself and within the world.

Why is your attendance so limited?

There is negligence on my part and on the part of the literary authorities. As for me, I am perhaps the one who most avoids such events and participations, even though I know their importance and impact on others. However, the idea of ​​reading my poems aloud is very sensitive, and I feel uneasy trying to share what I write aloud with others. I am still trying to step outside my comfort zone and connect with readers with a more confident approach. We can all agree that recitation and the poet's immersion in the text imbue it with a spirit that allows the listener to grasp the emotion and connect with the idea more quickly and perhaps more deeply than through reading it. However, this doesn't make it a standard for determining the aesthetic value of poetry, critically speaking. Furthermore, I believe that the traditional method of reciting and conveying poetry no longer attracts an audience thirsty for creativity and wonder in today's fast-paced world.

•Have you planned a poetry project that will span decades?

Poetry is a spirit that clothes its owner, and his identity from which he derives his steadfastness. It accompanies me in my work in the film industry as a screenwriter, in my hobby as a visual artist, and in my personal life as a teacher, friend, and sister. Therefore, it is said that a poet stops writing when reality triumphs over the magic in his soul.

The poet Mallarmé says: This is the obsession of all poets... Perhaps some poets see stopping the writing of poetry as a predicament or a crisis, and perhaps others see it as part of the writing itself.

Just like Paul Valéry, who remained silent for about 15 years and then returned to write his wonderful long poem (The Young Park).

• How many releases have you made?

•• I have a collection of poems entitled “Out of Time”, and another one that I am about to publish soon.

• Did any of them receive any recognition or awards?

•• My first collection of poems won the Abu al-Qasim al-Shabbi Prize in Tunisia.

What are you worried about, both artistically and emotionally?

We can say that anxiety is the offering of poetry. Anxiety is the primary driver of creativity. The complacent do not write. Art in general, including poetry, imitates the sensory world. I cannot recall a single day when poetry did not affect my soul, shape my day, and help me achieve inner balance. As an art form, it will continue to serve humanity's constant need for self-expression, attempts to change reality, and the promotion of causes and principles. Poetry will not lose its importance as long as humanity's natural need for expression persists. However, as I see it, it may take on other forms depending on the nature of life and the general atmosphere surrounding the poem. Poetry has come to revolve often around the self, philosophy, and the attempt to deconstruct, analyze, and construct ideas. It seeks to read the world through a multi-dimensional lens and explore how humanity can overcome its inner alienation and find meaning that does not destroy its being. Humanity cannot live without being moved by emotion and without poetry touching its soul.

• What is the effect of the poet's sensual beauty on her text, her audience, and her critics?

•• I believe that beauty is power in all its forms, but when we talk about writing, it is the idea that will remain immortal, and how it was formulated.

Which poem is your favorite and most cherished?

•• Every text has its own spirit, stance, and desire to be beloved; therefore, I cannot give preference, and some texts by poet friends touch me perhaps more than what I have written.

• If you weren't a poet, what would you be? And why?

•• A poet; because poets rewrite history.. and because poetry has the power to depict reality, analyze it, redraw events, and document them..

Poetry is nothing but a reflection of the poet's soul, thoughts, and culture—the lens through which he interprets life and attempts to translate what he can understand. And because the poet lives with an open heart, yearning for freedom..

This is what I always want to be... to live with a beating heart and an alert mind.

What about childhood, home, studies and specialization?

Childhood is the first home of feelings... and what small situations created in my perceptions of life, my soul, my tranquility, and my rebellion alike... Childhood has the effect of a scalpel on our souls... making it impossible to return to what was before that event that brought us to where we are now...

Music, games, and even those lullabies before sleep were all woven into the fabric of our souls.

• What poem do you dream of writing?

•• The poem that resembles me; because the poet is ultimately concerned with himself; therefore, I still dream of writing something that resembles me exactly, with all the women who live inside me... and that is what makes it a dream.

What is it that you keep looking for and wish you wouldn't find?

•• The pursuit of perfection... perfection of vision... perfection of understanding... perfection of the image reflected from ourselves and about us,

And I believe that what I truly believe is that beauty is us, with our inner turmoil, our clutter, our mistakes, our humanity... there is no absolute perfection, nor absolute depth.